Frequently Asked Questions
1. What are some other terms for abuse?
Controlling, battering, wife beating, bullying, power tripping, bulldozing, domineering
2. What is relationship violence?
It is emotional, physical and/or sexual abuse of one partner by another in a relationship. It occurs within both heterosexual and gay and lesbian relationships.
3. How do I know if I'm being abused in a relationship?
Does your partner
- ignore your feelings and wishes? Call you names and put you down?
- tease and ridicule you about things that are important to you?
- not keep your secrets?
- ignore or pretend not to hear you?
- keep you away from your friends or put your friends down?
- sulk when you don't do what she/he wants? threaten suicide?
- show anger and use threats/violence to get his own way?
- encourage or pressure you to do things that make you feel uncomfortable?
- refuse to accept your limits about sexual activity?
4. How do I know if my relationship is positive/healthy?
Do you...
- listen to each other?
- consider each other's feelings and ideas?
- enjoy spending time with each other?
- respect, trust and support each other?
- remember little things that are important to each other?
- let the other be first sometimes?
- value and take care of yourselves?
- respect each other's culture?
5. How do I get help?
- Talk to someone you trust.
- Look in the front of the phone book for helpful resources in your community.
- Look at the Help Links on this website.
- In an emergency, call police-911.
- Keep telling! Keep asking!
Adapted from a RespectEd Violence & Abuse Prevention pamphlet.
6. Why do men hurt the women they claim to love?
7. Why don't women leave men who abuse them?
8. Can abusers change?
- http://www.theraveproject.com/index.php/faqs/can_abusers_change/C44/
- http://www.theraveproject.com/index.php/faqs/can_abusers_change/C43/